This is Deltora. It was consumed by the evil Shadow Lord. He has these grey guards. They leave these little marks. It means they have been here. I'm Leif and this is Barda and Jasmine. The king and queen went into hiding because of the Shadow Lord .The belt of Deltora had seven gems that got scattered all over Deltora in the worst of the worst places, the Forest of Scilence. The Lake of Tears, City of Rats, Shifting Sand, Dread Mountain, Maze of the Beast and the Valley of the Lost are all guarded by ugly monsters and here's the map.
Deltora sounds like a scary place being consumed by an Evil Shadow Lord. I would like to find the seven gems but I think it would be scary getting past the ugly monsters that guard them.
ReplyDeleteWish: I really like the way you used strong adjectives to describe the lord and the monsters that guard Deltora.
Opps that comment was from Miss Collins
ReplyDeleteZac, The evil Shadow Lord sounds scary and not very nice.
ReplyDeleteStar - I liked how you used a strong verb "scattered"
Wish - your next step is to develop a plot for your story. It needs a beginning, a middle and an end.
i like your hook (this is deltora it was consumed by the evil shadow lord)
ReplyDeletei liked how you aded the names of the places
ReplyDeletehehehe
from kane
I like it miss car
ReplyDelete